Living with an Alcoholic Spouse or Partner

Many individuals join support groups such as SMART recovery, or a twelve-step alcoholics anonymous program. Individuals who use alcohol as a way to cope with underlying mental health issues may benefit from working with a psychiatrist to find medications to manage their underlying issues. For many alcoholics, drinking is a means of moderating their emotions and feelings to avoid the negative ones. For a high-functioning alcoholic, they may be inebriated sometimes, or they may be sober other times. This results in what appears to be a split personality, where either they are up or down. This kind of roller coaster of emotional management can take its toll in the long run because gradually the highs and lows will become more pronounced.

functional alcoholic husband

We’re here 24/7 to help you get the care you need to live life on your terms, without drugs or alcohol. Talk to our recovery specialists today and learn about our integrated treatment programs. Ultimately, being in a relationship with an alcoholic is a physically and emotionally draining experience. You have to remember that, ultimately, it is not your burden to carry. However, it’s not something that you can control or cure, and it’s certainly not something that you have caused. If a person constantly leans on alcohol to ease the stress of a long day at work, or for dealing with problems in a relationship, they could have a serious problem.

How To Cope When Living With An Alcoholic Spouse

This is a pattern that should be monitored if it persists routinely. Having a beer with lunch or celebrating a holiday during the daytime is far different than routinely having drinks during the day. Make sure to take connected symptoms such as lying about drinking or hiding their actions seriously.

Which marriage has highest divorce rate?

The Country With the Highest Divorce Rate is Maldives With a Crude Divorce Rate of 5.52. Some countries have more than double the average divorce rate. This includes the Maldives with a crude divorce rate of 5.52, Kazakhstan with a rate of 4.6 and Russia, with a rate of 3.9.

According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, In 2019, more than 25 percent of adults reported that they engaged in binge drinking in the past month. Having a high functioning alcoholic or addict spouse can be one of the most tumultuous things you’ll deal with in your life. It doesn’t matter if they’re a high functioning alcoholic or addict. You can educate yourself on and alcohol abuse and alcoholism (Alcohol Use Disorder), how to maintain your wellbeing, and offer support without enabling. It sounds like a manageable list, but it can be terrifying at first. Education, awareness and action are the best ways to help your functioning alcoholic spouse.

Don’t have any sort of conversation while you or your partner is under the influence.

A high-functioning alcoholic may specifically forbid people from being in their home because they do not want to expose their drinking habits to the world. High functioning alcoholics may seem to have it all going for them on the outside, but this does not mean they aren’t experiencing significant personal or business-related problems underneath. And being in a relationship with or being under the care of a high functioning alcoholic can cause serious psychological and emotional damage. If your spouse is showing signs of alcoholism, it will only get worse and lead to more problems.

We offer free phone consultations to discuss your or your loved one’s condition and available recovery resources. We are fully committed to getting you the help you need as quickly as possible. We offer the necessary levels of care for a successful substance abuse treatment, like outpatient or individual therapy. The participants in an intervention could include the alcoholic’s spouse or partner, children, parents, friends, coworkers, employer, friends and other individuals who have been affected.

A Family Law Strategy Session Designed For Your Needs

There are many men and women who have suffered from alcoholism in their life but have achieved sobriety and maintained it. What we write below is validated through our significant experience with California divorce cases that involve substance abuse. Staying in a marriage to a substance abusing alcoholic who refuses to get help will break you or the children. Drinking more than three drinks in a single sitting will temporarily cause your blood pressure to rise, but extended binge drinking or regular alcohol consumption can cause a permanent increase in blood pressure. If your spouse fits any of these criteria, that may help you to understand why an alcohol use disorder is affecting your family. If your spouse is related to someone with an AUD, that could be contributing to their problems with alcohol.

  • While in social settings, the high-functioning alcoholic could be outgoing and gregarious, but behind closed doors they simply want to be, and drink, alone.
  • Having a high functioning alcoholic or addict spouse can be one of the most tumultuous things you’ll deal with in your life.
  • Or, they get bombed every weekend but don’t skip a beat at their demanding job.
  • The alcoholic is then presented with a plan of care, including a proposal of consequences if they decide to refuse.

These are ways to deal with the strong urge to drink that they experience on a daily basis.

How Different Sexes Deal with AUDs

They tend to be competent in most aspects of their lives, having a job, being successful, and taking care of their family despite their substance abuse. It can be difficult for anyone, even for the person married to them, to recognize there is alcohol addiction. Arguments and fighting aren’t the only issues at play when you are married to a high-functioning alcoholic. Some women may follow the lead of the alcoholic husband in denial, and also pretend that nothing is wrong.

  • Thus, it will be leaned on cyclically as stress increases in the life of a functional alcoholic.
  • They might ask the person about health problems they are experiencing and tell them if there’s a link to chronic drinking.
  • They may be able to sense when the spouse has had enough and do whatever it takes to win her over again.
  • Drinking doesn’t just affect the individual; it affects the entire family unit.
  • You wonder what you’re missing, what they’re missing, whether there’s something better out there or if it’s a classic case of the grass being greener in someone else’s yard.

But they are not able to see the toll drinking is taking on their lives, and the lives of their loved ones, and continued alcohol abuse can’t go on forever without causing serious physical, emotional and mental damage. Unfortunately, because they don’t believe their drinking is an issue, high-functioning alcoholics may not seek out the help they need. In fact, functional alcoholics are often people who seem to ‘have it all; they maintain a busy social life, work hard at their careers and are often well-liked by their neighbors. These are people who tend to be well-educated and intelligent, and they are most likely in denial about the scope of their drinking problem.

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